Listen to episodeSeason 4, Episode 3Have you ever been to the eye doctor and found out that your vision prescription has changed? Similarly, there are factors that can limit our relational vision, and it can change over time as well.  It can be helpful to our vision of our relationships to look through different lenses.  Below I share some thoughts on different types of lenses for you to consider - especially if there are any hints or clues that your current lens might be causing you to miss something. 

🎧LISTEN TO EPISODE Season 4, Episode 2 Four Foundational Responsibilities of Christian Adoptive Parents Today we're discussing the foundational responsibilities of parenting: protection, provision, and guidance. Plus, particularly if you are a Christian it is crucial to pray for each of your children and your family persistently. #1 - Protection is about keeping your children safe from physical or psychological harm. It can involve a variety of issues that can come up such as shielding them from dangers such as drugs and alcohol, protecting their innocence in terms of exposure to inappropriate topics or activities, providing physical boundaries around the home, enforcing rules that keep your kids away from potentially dangerous situations, setting limits on screen time and internet usage, and more. If this all sounds overwhelming, I totally get it. And I’ll remind you of the old saying, “Don’t borrow trouble”  a biblical principle found in Jesus’ famous “Sermon on the Mount” in Matthew 6:34 –“Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own.” 

🎧 Listen to episode[S4E1]Overcoming Isolation & Finding Support for YourselfFeeling isolated & unsupported? “It’s not just you!”

🎧 Listen to episodeWouldn’t you agree that parenting is sometimes hard work? How about when the dynamics of family life change with the addition of adopted children or stepchildren? In my experience as an adoptive mom, it can be difficult to navigate through conflicting advice, unreasonable expectations, and ever-evolving relationships in a bustling household. 

🎧 Listen to episode[S3E10]Always feeling behind? When all of you is still not enough…Being an adoptive or step mom can feel like you’ve embarked upon a daunting task to try to fill the void that your child already has. I know those types of feelings. It can feel like a tremendous responsibility. But as adoptive or step moms we must remember that we cannot make up for any losses in our children's lives – but instead can focus on providing stability for all of our children. Even as they push against that very stability they need. 

Q. What is Parental Abuse? A. Parental abuse, also called by other names (CPV - Child to Parent Violence; APV - Adolescent to Parent Violence)  is when a child/adolescent abuses a parent.This can be done through words (threatening) or physical actions, and often results in fear for the safety of the abused parent. It usually refers to physical violence.  However there are other types of abuse as well.If you are being threatened or physically harmed by your teenager, it is important to take steps to ensure your safety. This may mean leaving the home temporarily until things calm down, calling the police, or seeking help from a friend or family member. 

🎧 Listen to episodeDoes Your Adopted Child Have Lingering Effects of Their Prior Trauma? When a child is adopted, it is often thought that their previous traumatic experiences will automatically disappear. However, this is not always the case. In fact, many adopted children suffer from the effects of their childhood trauma long after they have been removed from the abusive environment.This can be due to a number of factors. For example, some adoptees may feel like they are not worthy of love and support because they were given up by their birth parents. Others may feel like they are constantly being judged by others because of their adoption status. As a result, these adoptees may struggle to form healthy relationships with others and may struggle with self-esteem issues.

 From the paperwork & legalities to the physical and emotional tolls, there's no denying that adoption is a BIG undertaking. If you're thinking about becoming an adoptive parent, or are in the process of adopting, you're probably aware of many challenges that come with the territory.

Second Moms - I'm here to remind you that you are a “Mom For REAL” and can feel REAL too! ...Let's spell it out....R is for realistic and also the reality checks we may need from time to time. Reality-based expectations can help us hold onto truth while also holding onto hope & joy!....E is for empowered.... which is what you can be when you look to God and lean into him while watching expectantly for the ways he is working in the details of your life. 

Becoming a parent is one of the most rewarding, but also challenging, experiences a person can have. I can tell you from experience that for adoptive moms, there are added challenges that come with raising children who have experienced early childhood traumas.  In particular, losing the primary biological relationship with their first mom causes deep wounds.